Angelic freedoms, the labors of humanity, guilt, fear, love, Luna, and Sol

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           It is a blissless awakening from the angelic freedoms into the labors of humanity. and fun, brought from the firmament down into the form, are suddenly powerless to repel the onslaught of oppression, confusion, contortion, and control. And I know that I am not alone with this feeling.

To be sure, all the gentle morons will do anything just to get in the way. Guilt, and fear, and shame are the weapons of their lies, of their corrupt and demented efforts to get us to betray our true natures.

They- the great they- and all others like them, will teach us how to feel inadequate- they call it being different- so that we should forever feel needy, and insufficient of spirit, and quiver at the thought of aloneness, absolute aloneness. Better to belong to a lie, they say, than belong nowhere. But all we need to do is have one good look at their lives- their terrified, neurotic, guilt-ridden lives- and that one look is enough to never have such need again.

They- the great they- for whom there is neither sin nor rapture, it is to them that I turn aside.

Everything mankind has created is futile, and if not futile, useless.

They- the great they- are all far off the mark, and have strayed irreconcilably from the directionless way. No matter what they tell us, and man they will tell us a heap of things- like how there must be a job suited to us, and how we must bend and torture our souls into position to do that job, and if there are none that suit us, regardless, still we must work. We must keep working, for ourselves, the future, the world. Set the clock and be ready to destroy ourselves every morning. Come on, we are all needed, just one more corpse upon the stack, and we’ll have a proper pile! They will never be finished wheezing out their pusillanimous yarns.

They will say- this is what life is, and this is how you must live it, for there is no other way. And let me tell you, if we tolerate their false realities they will destroy us. They will keep us confused with useless information, and we will be punished for seeing right through. And if they succeed to confuse us, and we live full in the delirium of identity, only then will we have died.

Others will try to make us believe that we exist as they say we do. They will try to make us need things. And they will try to make us live improperly. They will trap us in the Form, and further in the Content, and then in the shackles of reason. For it only takes one wall to make a box out of us. One anchor, one need, one step in any direction described by mankind, and we are finished. We then spend our whole lives walking around that wall. And the wall never ends, and freedom lies inches away, and we never find it, and we die as dead as we lived.

But the lie of the world will hold us in hell only if we allow it to hold us. And to leave hell we must each leave alone, the world cannot come with us, because the world of mankind loves hell, and loves the depthless surface, the tepid, ensconcing dreamless sleep of meaning, the spiritual squalor of useless creations, and the wrecked and irredeemable conclusions of the mind. Their pleasures are their masks of pain in their loveless hell.

            And yet we will not bring forth our own love until we have hated all the lies. And that hate is love itself, the love of emancipation, the chick thrashing feverishly for the fuller life outside. For beyond those crippling rays, we will bring to the night the light of day, and midnight will become the noon hour, and Luna will be Sol for a day.

***

These fragments are taken from unpublished writings by Jack Haas, selected from the notebooks 1990-2005.